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14 April 2005; 10:52 PM

input = output

not sure how to explain how i'm feeling, other than to tell you i've been reading diane diprima's memoirs (not memoirs of a beatnik - the more recent recollections of my life as a woman), and finally able to joyously listen to billy bragg & wilco's mermaid avenue again. i feel very inspired by these two things. it's crazy how artistic input and output is so often the only way to see your way clear of despair and discouragment.

thinking about editing and fleshing out some of my old papers from kepler, so i can post them and feel good about it. i have a whole lot of ideas about making more art, too.

oliver is home, asleep and feverish after many hours on a plane. i'm glad he's where i can watch over him again.

notes to myself:
remember when you got the symbols for KNOWLEDGE and DISCIPLINE carved into your skin with a fast metal needle so you wouldn't forget how important these two things are? how they work together? how you can't have one without the other?

what about connecting music with culture and with time instead of with a person? what about being confident in the path of your life and that continuum, not focusing so much on the other?

just a thought.